Like Water for Chocolate, because that's all we'll be having

Guys, I have some bad news.

Yesterday I tested chocolate. It did not go well.

I bought everything-free Enjoy Life chocolate chips and just stared at the package for two weeks. Two weeks of fantasizing. These chocolate chips are lovingly and thoughtfully made without dairy, soy, corn, wheat, eggs...all of that nonsense. Isn't that awesome?

But none of that mattered to Julia. I controlled my urge to devour handful after handful of chocolatey goodness and ate five or six chips. And then I waited.

Julia woke up from her afternoon nap ANGRY. She cried and screamed and wailed and farted. It was epic gas. But I didn't figure out it was gas until three hours into the crying. I gave her gas drops and that helped immensely. But she was still one pissed off baby.

No blood in her diapers at least, even today. But oh wow can that girl scream. It reminded me of her colicky days. It made me want to stress eat chocolate. What a cruel cycle that would be.

Then today she developed little baby acne hives on her face. THANKS MOM she wailed between farts.

This was a tough one. But I can still hold out hope for tomatoes. Tomatoes and oats.